Planning for a wedding is hard work! Not only are there so many things to cover, but there are also so many vendors wanting to help you with them. And to top it all off, you’ve never had to hire a bunch of vendors for an event, and probably never will again!
When it comes to entertainment at weddings, many people unfortunately brush it off as a lesser task that doesn’t matter very much. You’re already spending a fortune on everything else, and the music doesn’t matter (at least that’s what some people think).
But did you know that after the wedding:
- Almost 100% of couples say they would have spent more of their budget on the Entertainment.
- Within one week after their Reception, 78% of couples say they would have made the Entertainment their highest priority.
- 81% of Guests say the thing they remember most about a Wedding is the Entertainment.
At my own wedding, we kept a very tight budget. We spent as little as possible on everything, including our entertainment. However, my wife wanted a little extra. Our DJ was a family member and probably did it for free, but my wife hired someone to sing for her walk down the aisle. I can tell you that there are two moments I remember most:
- “God Bless The Broken Road” was being sung live while my wife walked down the aisle. I was enthralled with how beautiful she looked, but also that the song just fit so perfectly.
- Creed’s “Higher” was supposed to play for our recessional, but the cue was off. So we started walking, then stopped, looked over at the DJ to see what was wrong as he was frantically slapping the laptop keyboard until the song finally started playing.
Key takeaways: Live music is always more memorable. It’s more sincere and special. It’s not just a track you’ve heard a bunch of times. And also, hire someone who knows what they are doing! Our live music could just as easily gone just as bad if the DJ messed up playing the backing track.
There are many factors to consider when hiring music entertainment for your wedding. So let’s take a look at each topic. Click on a topic to jump to it.
Engagement
What is the purpose of entertainment? The answer should be obvious: to be entertained. But you would be surprised how many people think wedding entertainment is background music. That’s not entertainment – it’s just noise. Do you pay for Netflix just to have something going on in the background? No, you pay for it to have entertaining things to watch. And when it fails to serve that purpose, you choose a different service.
A DJ setup is fairly simple. You’ve basically got your software of choice to play the songs in the setlist and the DJ to simply operate it. A person standing behind a table pressing buttons and sliding faders. Boring! In a picture, it just looks like a person standing there! A live musician is far more interesting to look at. You get to see that person play every single note with skillful precision and admire their talent. Your guests are enraptured by their melodies – not on their phones because a prerecorded track has them disengaged. What does that do for your ceremony? This is not just some waiting room; this day is about YOU!
During your social hour, the time is more about the conversation. But keep in mind that about half of your guests are introverts and may have a hard time socializing. Give them something to talk about! Having a live musician play for your social hour gives the event much more class than simply prerecorded music playing from somewhere. A social hour can feel like a long time in the wrong circumstances, so give your guests something to pass the time with real entertainment, even if you are serving cocktails and cheese.
The reception is typically where the DJ shines. Why? Because a good DJ has great emcee skills and can guide the evening along. A DJ is known for having the cool lighting and the thumping bass. But why couldn’t a band provide all of those things? After all, the lead singer of your band could be the emcee, they can have a lighting package, and hey, an actual bass player! There are other reasons a DJ might be better for your reception, as we’ll get into below, but a band is obviously much more engaging for any circumstance.
Conclusion: Live music of any kind is much more engaging than a DJ.
You don’t pay for concert tickets to have the venue play a recording of your favorite band. So why would you do that for your wedding?
Speaking of pay, let’s analyze the cost of hiring a DJ or a musician.
Cost
The cost of hiring anyone for your wedding comes down to how much that person values their time and/or product. For caterers, you’re paying for the quality of the food plus their time to prepare, serve, and clean up. Paying for entertainment isn’t much different. But there is a big cost disparity when hiring DJs versus live music.
Hiring a DJ to play your entire wedding is a pretty basic ordeal. You pick the songs and where to play them, and the DJ delivers. Generally, however, the couple doesn’t pick EVERY SINGLE song. That would be an extremely mundane task that you don’t need while planning your wedding. So the DJ uses his/her expertise to play the appropriate songs throughout the day to fill in the gaps. So you are getting their experience, skill as an emcee, and of course you’re paying for the setup of the sound system and lights. You might also be paying for their library of songs, since they either purchased and downloaded them or are paying a premium subscription.
Musicians, however, have something that sets them apart from DJs: musical skill. I don’t care how long a DJ has DJ’ed weddings and what that experience brings to your event – most of their front end work is loading songs into a setlist and just needs executed on gameday. Musicians spend HOURS practicing their instruments and rehearsing the songs to prepare for a wedding. Plus, the more musicians there are, the more expensive it will be (and should be, if that group values their time). Some lesser known considerations are the value of their instruments and of their music library, since they must pay in either cash or time to have music sheets and/or tracks to go along with their act. And because of that, a band can cost a lot more than a DJ. However, a soloist can be less expensive and rival the cost per hour of a DJ.
Conclusion: A DJ is usually cheaper than a live band, but might be equal or more expensive than a soloist.
Song Selection
You can’t talk about music entertainment without considering the actual music! The only reason this topic comes after cost is because weddings are expensive and cost plays a huge consideration (almost too much) when hiring entertainment.
With a DJ, you know what you are getting. You get the songs you want, the version you want, and you know how it goes because you’ve heard it before. There’s familiarity there. There’s also the danger that a particular song has been overplayed and risks disengagement. There’s the danger that a song has explicit or suggestive lyrics and risks offending people. And lastly, they can ONLY play what has already been recorded, they can never create, so there is the possibility they can not provide exactly what you’re looking for.
With a live musician, it can be a new and fresh experience every time. Since most of our music consumption is recorded music rather than live, live music is more interesting even if you’ve heard the song a million times. Whether using a cover band or a soloist, it’s almost impossible to sound exactly like the recording. You can ask your musician to play a stripped-down acoustic version of a rock song, or a string-ensemble version of a pop song. You can ask them to take the explicit lyrics out or replace the words. There is the opportunity for a very creative, unique experience with live music, which is something you simply cannot accomplish with most DJs (unless they are VERY good). And that’s what your wedding should be…it shouldn’t just be like every other wedding you’ve been to.
Another thing to consider is repertoire (fancy word for music we can actually play). A DJ can play everything ever recorded just with the touch of a button. A musician, however, is highly limited by a few things:
- The time it takes to learn a song
- Song retention (remembering how it goes)
- Genre (a musician rarely plays in more than 2 or 3 styles)
- Talent level
Because of these, a musician can only ever play what they know (you don’t want them playing things YOU don’t know, or what THEY don’t know and are just making up). But most musicians will gladly learn your songs, as it adds to their repertoire (and satisfies a paying customer). However, there are certain songs that musicians simply cannot play, or they would be unrecognizable. This is true in certain dance songs, since most of these are heavily synthesized, and this is where a DJ shines at a reception. Most musicians can’t play your favorite dance tunes without having some sort of different spin on it.
But I hope the actual takeaway here is that what you trade for in availability you make up for with uniqueness, and vice versa. It really just depends what you are going for.
Conclusion: Live music allows creativity but is limited by the human element. A DJ can play any song but is limited by what is on the recording.
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The Human Element
In the previous topic, I made mention of the human element. It is an important aspect of hiring vendors. Wedding professionals aim to work robotically to make your wedding celebration seamless. They don’t want to draw attention away from you. However, we are all human! We make mistakes!
When it comes to live wedding music, the last thing you want is for a music act to sound robotic and look stiff. But the reality is that people get nervous. And performing live music is one of the most nerve-wracking things happening during a wedding (sorry to say, even your walk down the aisle!).
I have been playing live for over 24 years and I still get nervous before every single show. Even Sunday worship, which I do at least once a month.
Watching someone play live music – you can’t get much more human than that. Especially if you see that person smile or make eye contact. And we humans desire that type of interaction. Can you remember any time you’ve interacted with a DJ? I have been to multiple weddings and the only DJs I remember were people I knew. But I always remember the live musicians. There is just something you can appreciate about the time and care that person took to learn all the skills and practice the music to make someone’s day special.
Humans, however, do get tired, especially those performing live music. Musicians stand or sit in sometimes unnatural positions for long periods of time to perform, and they need breaks to stretch. Those who sing need vocal rest. DJs do not need these things. Sure, they get tired too, but they can take sit breaks or drink water or stretch whenever they need to. Heck, during social hour, they can press Play and go eat some cheese and mingle with the guests. Plus, their actual job is not hard; they press buttons and manipulate faders and give short vocal cues when necessary; the hardest part of their job is making sure things are happening at the right time.
The most human a DJ gets is at the reception, when you get to see them interact with the crowd to get them on the dance floor. I have seen some DJs do some really unique things that guests love. One of my friends DJs for weddings, and he did a game with a slow dance song where people stayed on the dance floor based on how long they’ve been married. I was so proud to watch all these couples go sit down, and here we are – this relatively young couple – stayed up there with the older folks until he surpassed 15 years. Very interactive! But you know, he was able to sit at a table throughout the night and talk to us and let the setlist do its thing. It would be unthinkable for a live musician to do that.
I mentioned earlier that you wouldn’t want a live musician to look stiff, but that is exactly how a DJ at a ceremony looks. In fact, no one cares how they look. Guests only care how loud it is. If it were live music, guests will most likely forgive it. And if you’ve hired a cheap DJ, they will be stiff no matter what. I saw an old acquaintance of mine at a friend’s wedding, completely surprised that he was there to DJ the wedding (because he was a musician and he’s too quiet to be a DJ!) I could tell he was pretty new and inexperienced because he was very stiff and dry, and the reception was pretty lame (I remember leaving pretty early).
The human element can affect us all. It is both a blessing and a curse. Which do you want for your wedding?
Conclusion: Live musicians are more memorable and interactive but have more needs, while a DJ tends to be more background and robotic but can perform longer with less needs.
Ease to Work With
I think most couples think of DJs as being easy to work with and musicians as being difficult divas. ANY professional should make it their goal to be the easiest vendor to work with (this is my goal as well). Couples have to deal with lots of vendors; the last thing they need is to have a vendor stress them out because of an ego and an unwillingness to serve. Someone’s ease to work with is more about their heart, not what they offer.
In your planning session with your DJ, you’ll most likely talk about what songs you want for your big moments, you’ll discuss your timeline for both the ceremony and reception, and you might talk about overall feel. A DJ, with his/her extensive library of songs, is most likely going to be able to fulfill your wishes with ease. Then you kind of trust them to fill in all the gaps with what they think goes along with your day, based on the hundreds of weddings they’ve done before.
My planning sessions would be very similar to a DJ’s, except I would be asking questions about dynamics. I would ask, “Do you want it to sound more like the track, or do you want it stripped back a bit? Do you want an instrumental or for it to be sung? This song is originally by a female; can I change it for me to sing, or would you like a female singer? This song would sound better as an acoustic version; could I do that for you?” The point is that we can make it what we want, and you are being guided every step of the way to find a way to make your vision a reality.
Because of the unique aspect of live music, there is more to consider, but a good musician should be guiding the client every step of the way, making suggestions where they are appropriate, using their musical know-how to make sure certain songs fit well in certain places. Most DJ’s do not consider what keys songs are in, because they don’t need to. This does not make DJs easier to work with, but it does make their job easier. A musician can and should be just as easy, because they have already considered that which most people do not consider.
Most DJs are music listeners like you. Musicians are not only music listeners but also music players, with the ability to understand what exactly needs to be manipulated to achieve a certain result. Want your song classed up by a string quartet? I guarantee an actual string quartet can achieve that, but a DJ may not have what you are looking for.
How easy a person is to work with really depends more on what you are looking for versus what that person offers. So it’s not really a musician vs. DJ thing. Do you want something more cookie-cutter? A DJ can do that in their sleep (and they just might!). Looking for something more unique? A live musician will be more flexible with that.
Hiring entertainment is often thought of as a secondary task made much easier by simply hiring a DJ to take care of it. But is this the right way to go? Would you do this with other aspects of your wedding?
Would you let your caterer choose what and when to serve your guests? Would you let your photographer just take pictures of whatever they want? Would you tell your officiant, “Go ahead and do whatever you normally do.”? Would you let someone else choose your wedding gown, for crying out loud?
What a minute…are you just another couple getting married? Is this just some thing we show up to but don’t really want to because it’s like every other wedding? NO! You and your fiancee’ are unique, and your wedding deserves to be unique and memorable. So greater care needs to be taken when hiring your entertainment.
Conclusion: An act being “easy” to work with depends more on what you ask of them, and less of what their job description is.
Conclusions
So, obviously, it is difficult for me to have an unbiased opinion. Being a musician, of course I think live music is better! I have been a worship leader for over 12 years, and I can tell you without doubt the worst times of worship have been to a recording. The most memorable times have been completely live and with an audience who has been engaged.
Don’t you want that for your wedding? Don’t you want people to be completely enthralled and in the moment for your walk down the aisle, for your vow exchange, for your unity moment?
I do, however, have my limitations! I can only learn so many songs. I can’t play every instrument. I can’t play every genre. Because of that, I can’t fit into everyone’s box. I can only offer what I offer.
Most DJs offer the same thing just packaged a little differently; one may offer photo booths, some offer smoke machines, but they all offer the same pre-packaged music. It’s like shopping at the grocery store. You see all the brand names next to each other, all offering something a little different at slightly different prices, but at some point, spaghetti sauce is spaghetti sauce. You ever notice how all DJs have pricing on their websites? That’s one of the only ways they compete with each other: either offer the same thing at a lower cost, like the store brand, or offer better quality. Because they for sure can’t offer a different music experience.
Most DJs do other events, not just weddings. Because of that, they specialize in dance music, not in the memory-making necessities of a ceremony. Unfortunately, most musicians don’t specialize in weddings either. They play what they play, which is why they find themselves competing with DJs for receptions. As mentioned above, this is where cost comes into play, and a DJ will win every time for couples on a tight budget. People just don’t value live music, and live musicians simply don’t value themselves enough. This is why I think we’ve seen the decline of live music, and more specifically, live music for weddings.
There is, however, a demand for live music for ceremonies. People want that moment to feel special and more sincere. I just think people aren’t aware that good options exist. And some people just don’t know what they want. They are satisfied with hiring one person for all entertainment, attempting to fit that square peg in the round hole. But it doesn’t have to be that way.
My Final Thoughts
Why not do both? DJs do great at receptions because they do a lot of them and they know what keeps a crowd on the dance floor. Their flexibility to play any number of songs gives them unparalleled power to command the event. Also, they are easier on the checkbook. But they lack that finesse required to evoke emotion at a ceremony. Your cocktail/social hour could go either way, but it’s going to look and sound better to have a musician or ensemble play. A DJ can literally press play and walk away.
My suggestion: hire a live musician for your ceremony and social hour, and hire a DJ for your reception. You will get the best of both worlds. There is no need for musicians and DJs to be mortal enemies…we can collaborate to make your wedding the best day of your life!
A good musician shouldn’t cost you much more than adding that DJ to your ceremony, and he/she’ll do a better job setting the mood.
DJs: please don’t be offended by any of these opinions! Yes, it hurts when we consistently lose clients to DJs, but I genuinely think if we worked together more and actively partnered together, we could see some of the best weddings yet!
By the way, did you know that Jake’s FretWorks specializes in Ceremonies and Social Hours? We can do certain elements of your Reception as well, if you’d like! If a live singing guitarist is something you might be interested in, click the button below to check out our demo reel!
And if you’re ready to take the next step, fill out an inquiry, and we’ll check back with you on the availability of your date!
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